life is a roller coaster

Last Wednesday night I was watching TV with my mom upstairs and surfing the web when I decided to check my email.  Suddenly I jumped up from my favorite recliner, grabbed my mother by the hand, and led her downstairs to where my dad was reading and proceeded to read:

baylorbears

“Dear Jessica,
The School Psychology Faculty Committee completed its review of candidates for the 2013-2014 academic year and we were very impressed with your application…We would like to complete a 30-40 minute interview via Skype in the next few weeks…”

Then my dad, not missing a beat, replied, “Well, I guess you’ll be moving to Texas then.”  Perhaps he got a little ahead of the situation, but I am very excited about interviewing with BAYLOR, and I’m certainly hoping and praying for the opportunity to attend graduate school there.

This whole graduate school application process has truly been grueling, but there are two moments thus far that have been more rewarding than I anticipated.  Obviously getting an email for an interview is a pretty rewarding moment.  However, I also keep thinking back to the difficult time I was having with writing my personal statement.  I tend to write in a stream of consciousness, often providing more details than necessary or desired, so coming up with a format that would fit my life history and future desires into a brief personal statement was a challenge in itself.  Content was also difficult; I wanted to include everything because everything feels relevant to who I am as a person.  However, I knew everything would not seem relevant to the professors who would review my application.  I had a lot of decisions to make when writing my personal statement, but quite frankly I was over thinking the whole thing.  One evening I sat down with a detailed outline and several very rough drafts, and instead of following those, I decided to write what was on my heart.  I thought to myself, “What do I want to do, and why do I want to do it?”  Then, I started crying.

That was the first rewarding experience that I had with this application process because for the first time in the past four years I felt like I was on the right track.  I know I want to help provide children with the same educational opportunities that I have had, and I know that I want to do that through school psychology.  My experience with tutoring children in Macon and visiting after-school facilities overseas only confirmed that desire in my heart over the years.  Now I’m at the point where I have to take the next step to reach my goals, and that involves graduate school.  So even though this application process has been more difficult than I could possibly imagine, I know that it will all be worth it if I get into a program that allows me to build on my education and enables me to provide children with educational opportunities in the future.  I pray that God will continue to open doors for my education.  He has been faithful, and I believe He has a plan.  Whether it involves teaching in China or going to grad school for school psychology at Baylor or both, I know He is in control.  For that, I am thankful.

A friend reminded me today to think about the desires of my heart in terms of Philippians 4:4-8, which says,

“Rejoice in the Lord always; again I will say, Rejoice. Let your reasonableness be known to everyone.  The Lord is at hand; do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

phil48 copy

Advertisements

One thought on “life is a roller coaster

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s